Sunday, September 30, 2007

The Year Rocktoberized

Just as Black history is featured in February, Women’s history in March, Asian Pacific American heritage in May, Hispanic heritage from mid-September to mid-October, American Indian heritage in November, classic rock has traditionally claimed the month of Rocktober.

Classic rock DJ’s spend the eleven other months of the year dutifully muttering the normal month names without inspiration, waiting for that one special month when they can cut loose and bring their full poetic license to bear, capitalizing, as our friend Idiom noted one dinner conversation back in June, on the serendipitous oblique rhyme of the first syllable of the tenth month of the year, “Oct-,” with their favorite music form “Rock.”

But why can’t classic rock shine just as brightly on every month? This Rocktober, Elrond Hubbard presents the full lineup of all twelve months of the year Rocktober-ized to allow classic rock fans to never feel overlooked, never release the gas button on their lighters, never have to go without the “Free Bird” and “Stairway to Heaven” that they don’t quite hear all the time anyway even if we don't mess with the month names.

Febujourney -- this was Febrourneyry but Glenn suggested the newer form for clarity.
Zepptember or Jefftember
We’ve already got Rocktober, so how about Ozztober
Doorsember or Pretember

Any other suggestions?


Glenn said...

I'm amused that you took the time to put this together. I like Zepptember. I think I'd go with Febujourney, with that spelling as commentary on both the band and its fans. Likewise, Aepril and Mayx need a little more. Rocktober is not a place for subtlety.

Elrond Hubbard said...

My favorites are Mayx and Aepril. They're elegant. Simple. Zen. Whole huge introductions of meaning into basic month names with the addition of one mere letter.

Friend X suggested Journuary for January, but that would leave out my favorite classic rock band Van Halen from the list, and I can't do that. Plus, then there'd be nothing for February.

Okay, I'll take your suggestion on Febujourney. The only rule I adhered to was that the new month name needed to have the same number of syllables as the old month name. I know everyone was wondering what my scheme was. Well. Now you know. And even Vanuhalery pushes that, depending on your accent.

Glenn said...

How about Vanuary?

Glenn said...

Uh-oh. A local radio station is currently giving away CD box sets for Boxtober.

Anonymous said...

Uh oh. The folks at the Onion have been keeping up with you:

The Month Of Zepcember

Cathelou said...

It has absolutely nothing to do with months, but you should consider doing something with the name "VanHalla." You know, "The legend returns for a THOR-OUGHLY amazing night in the mythic musical event of the century: VAN-HALLA!!!"

Just a thought.

The Newlyfeds